Thursday, February 24, 2011
So lets talk Cunt.
For some reason out of the blue the word has come up a billion times this week, so I felt moved to go on a love tirade.
Cunt can be a powerful word. But why?
Can you think of a worse word in the English language? One that conveys more hate, more disgust, or contempt? Urban dictionary can't, and if they can't I don't know its possible.
But, before you jump to use the word to convey your complete, justifiable anger and contempt of the person that screwed you out of money or a job take a moment:
What word do you think is used the most to refer to rape victims by their assailants?
What about women abused by their male partners?
Even more specifically, what about women emotionally abused by their partners?
What about prostitutes? What about child prostitutes?
Bitch is pretty high up there but one word reigns supreme: Cunt.
Because nothing quite gets that contempt across the way Cunt does.
Cunt has another component that makes it of particular interest to us:
It refers to women. When used on men it is to relate them to women. A Cunt is a Vagina is a Woman. There is no soley male word with the same intense meaning as Cunt. The only thing that comes close is dick. But dick can be bad (you're a total dick) or good, (he has a huge dick). Now, replace dick with Cunt. You're a total Cunt. A bit heavier, no?
What about: she has a huge Cunt. If said this would probably be meant to be insanely offensive.
Cunt takes all of the negative stereotypes about women and rolls them all into one word. When dissected you think things like: whore, bitch... again, all female.
Instead of propagating its use and the ideas behind it by using it to insult eachother and others let's own it. Let's use it to uplift eachother and ourselves. Let's kill the harsh bitterness attached to it.
As a woman who has heard this word in some of the worst of times I would like to ask you, humbly, with so much love, please don't use this word to attack. We are all so much better than what that word labels us as. We are awesome, amazing, revolutionaries, mothers, sisters and lovers.
Friday, February 18, 2011
But then I found feminism. And in the first feminist anthology I wrote, I read about all kinds of different women who loved their bodies for what they were; fat, skinny, in-between, big boobs, no boobs, post-op, black, white, whatever. Then I started reading articles on my then-favourite feminist blog, and there I found this site, VulvaLoveLovely.
At first I felt weird about seeing all these vulva necklaces. And then, suddenly, I loved it. I loved that these women loved their bodies enough to send a stranger pictures of them and then wear them proudly. I loved that they were taking control of their bodies, putting them on display in a way that was beautiful and not sexual. And I loved that it was very in-your-face, and made people re-think their assumptions, which appealed to my punk side.
A few months after I found VLL, I decided it was time to take a truly punk leap and pierce my clitoral hood. My ears were all pierced up, and my nose, and I had four tattoos at the time, and I wanted my yoni to feel the rock, too. The day when I took my pants off in front of my piercer and got a barbell downstairs, too, was the day I truly fell in love with my body.
Ever since, I've been so much happier. I don't feel shy taking my clothes off in front of new partners, or wearing bikinis on the beach or the pool. I modeled for my friend's figure drawing class. I ripped up the page I'd taken out of Cosmo about how to lose my belly and decided I liked that, too. I never complain about my body anymore, and when my friends tell me I'm too skinny I just shrug instead of feeling uncomfortable. I'm very happy being me, the size I was meant to be. I'm very comfortable in the skin I'm in, and the only change I'd ever want to make is to add more tattoos.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
I'll bet our portrait pendant customers would find this mad helpful. The pictures really are the trick to getting a perfect portrait piece.
So, here it is: The Model Photo Taking Magic.
Model Photo Taking Tips:
*The best light is natural light. Be sure your flash is off and take the photo where you get a lot of sunshine coming through a window. Flash distorts the color of the photo.
*If your camera has a macro setting use that while taking the photos. It’s the little icon that looks like a tulip (fitting, right?) . If not use the auto setting.
*When you go to push down the button and take the picture hold your breath. This will minimize how much your body shakes the camera and make for a clearer picture.
*If your having a hard time getting a photo with your vulva actually in it (taking a photo of something you can’t see can be tough) try setting up a mirror system so you can see the screen on the back of the camera in the mirror. If you don’t have a mirror you can take a picture and then look at it, use that to gauge how much and which direction you need to move the camera in.
*Think about if you want your pieces to represent your more natural look or if you want to have your inner labia splayed out. Use a hand mirror prior to snapping the photos to arrange your Vulva as you love her best.
*Don’t feel required to shave before taking your photos. We here at VLL love bush. How can you play bumper cars without bumpers? If you do rock your bush before taking the photos spread your labia apart, sort of pushing the hair “out of the way” so that the details of your inner labia are visible.
*Take as many pictures as you have the patience to, the more you take the better the chances are that there is one fantastic, clear picture in the lot. Send 2-3 photos with the name you would like to use. As far as the story goes there are no ‘rules’, speak your truth in whatever manner comes naturally.
*Most of all, enjoy this! I know it sounds awkward, but things are what you make of them. Take this opportunity to explore a part of yourself you can’t see with your own eyes. Celebrate it. When your taking the photos and looking at them later, don’t glance at them and decide they are horrible. I promise they are not. Look at them, look at the colors and the curves. Find something you love in them and own it.
Thank you so much for deciding to take part in our model program! I hope that it is an empowering experience for you and all of the women visitors that come across the piece. No matter what you look like you are beautiful, no matter what scars you have you are perfect. A shimmering white and silver portrait piece will be mailed to you in 5-6 weeks as a thank you and once your photos are received you will be e-mailed a life-long 10%off coupon code.
With so much Vulva Love,