Wednesday, February 13, 2013

A Love Letter to my Vulva: Arianna

My Lovely Arianna,

We haven’t had a morning like this together in quite a while…I really loved waking up with you, when we’re both fresh from a dream and still absorbed in the sweet haze of sleep…There was nothing to think about, nothing to worry about, only each other and the pleasure of the moment.
I’m sure I’m going to be late for work, but that doesn’t really matter. Valentine’s Day is nearly here, and thinking back on this year together, I’m pretty certain that I owe you an apology. I haven’t done my best to show you how much I appreciate you, and it shames me to think about how often I’ve ignored your needs. It’s easy during the week to tell myself that I’m just too busy, or that I’m too stressed, too tired, too angry, to give you the attention and compassion that you deserve.
I know it isn’t easy for you to submit to your polyester prison day after day, trapped in the constrictive, anti-femininity of Corporate Purgatory. I’m sorry…I promise that it will get better, and I’ll try to schedule in more time with the AA boys…I know you miss them.
I’m not always the best at expressing these things, but I Love you so much. We’ve been through a lot together; a lot of bad things happened that neither of us deserved, and you need to know that it wasn’t your fault. You’re probably thinking “I do know that”, but sometimes I can still feel the scars…even if we can’t see them anymore…
I want you to know that I revel in your fire and your passion, and I’m glad we never let popular opinion shape who we are. Everyone who said it was wrong to be together, or that there was something wrong with you, they were just ignorant, Baby. It’s because of you that I’m still alive, still fighting, still pushing for change, still have hope for a better world. There’s a place for both of us, and it will be one that we create for ourselves.
Thank you for never judging me, even though I can’t say I always did the same…Thank you for helping me heal, for showing me how to be strong, for teaching me to find myself, for inspiring me, and for forgiving me. I would not be the confident woman I am today without you.
You’re beautiful and perfect, and I respect all that you go through every month just to make sure that I’m healthy. You’re so in tune with me, and every day you find ways to help me be a better listener. I promise I’ll always be here to protect you, and more than ever, always be ready to cheer on your wild side…
Anyway, all I’m really trying to say is…Happy V-Day, my sweet.

P.S. I still don’t think we’re ever going to agree on that baby thing, but you’re welcome to keep on tryin’… 

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