The G Spot Part 2: Lets Play explorer

Before you go exploring you need some tools:
*G Spot Vibrator
*Lubricant
*A Sweet Explorer's Hat

Which lubricant you use is up to you, just make sure you stay away from anything flavored (very sticky).
The vibrator is a really important tool. I found that attempting to find it with my hand alone was highly unsuccessful and made my wrist hurt pretty sufficiently.

You have several options when choosing a G Spot vibrator. I recommend investing in these two:

The first one is firm, so its very easy to move around and reposition. This will be your main tool in finding your G Spot. You can get it here: http://tinyurl.com/mfk2xu for a whopping $7.90. While its not the best quality, its very affordable, ships quickly and three months later mine is still working. A nice side-note: its waterproof.


The second one is a 'jelly'. Its soft, flexible and has a textured clitoral stimulator. Because its flexible its really not very useful in finding your G Spot because you cant reposition it or move it around- it just kind of bends. The reason I recommend it is this: once you have found your G Spot you can use this toy to stimulate both your G Spot and your Clitoris at once- which is just super. You can get it here: http://tinyurl.com/ljb3el for only $9.95. Again, not the greatest quality but if you are low on funds they ship fast, are affordable and mine still works after 3 months. This is my favorite toy so it has seen quite a bit of use in those three months. Shipping for both was about $7-8 dollars for me.

Now that your geared up lets talk about where your G Spot is and how to find it.

First things first: make sure that you are very aroused before looking around. When you are highly aroused your G Spot swells, making it easier to find. Once you're revved up, lie on your back with your legs spread and knees bent. Start by using just your fingers. With your palm facing upward, gently slide your index and middle fingers a couple of inches into your vaginal canal and make slow come-hither motions against the front of your upper vaginal wall. It will be a small area that feels spongy. If you are aroused it should be engorged, making it more prominent. If you reach a structure that feels smooth and firm, like the tip of your nose, your touching your cervix (the lower part of the uterus), and you've gone too far up.

The only way to really know if you've hit the bull's-eye is if stroking the area arouses you. Massage it in a rhythmic motion with varying amounts of pressure, switching among a flickering move, rubbing from side-to-side, or tracing circles. Don't be surprised if you feel like you have to urinate. The feeling usually subsides. If you are anything like me doing this for just a few minutes makes your wrist hurt. Switch to your G Spot vibrator. This will make it much easier to reach and make massaging side to side and tracing circles much easier.

You are probably not going to find it the first time you go looking for it. Dont let it stress you out. Try for a little while and then move on, you have another button that is fun to push. Im sure your partner is amazing but they are not going to be able to find it and then stay in exactly that position for any useful amount of time. It would be like you pointing to a spot on the wall, sending them out of the house and then telling them to come back in and find that exact spot again with the lights out.

Because of its proximity to your urethra- take it easy. Don't be rough or try for longer than 15 minutes at a time with your fingers. The last thing you want to do is give yourself a UTI. Because your vibrators are more pin pointed and smooth than your hand they are less likely to agitate your urethra.

Remember: its not likely to send you into an instant mind blowing orgasm. For some women it will feel very nice, just like a clitoral orgasm can be very nice. For some women it may feel uncomfortable, just like some women find having their nipples pinched is uncomfortable. Some may not feel anything at all and some may have a very intense orgasm. Either way chances are good all of your lady parts are functional. If you find that stimulating your G Spot is not pleasurable or is uncomfortable there are plenty of other ways to enjoy yourself.

Most importantly: Be calm. Enjoy yourself. Take your time. Getting to know yourself, your body, and your Vagina can be very fulfilling and increase your ability to express your self sexually.

The G Spot Part 1: The Myth

I was wasting time in the forums the other day when I came along a conversation about the G spot. Of course I rushed in to see what was going on.
I found, to my horror, that 98% of the people (women and men) that were part of the conversation had a very misguided idea about what the G spot is. (See picture below)

Disclaimer: Results not typical

For the VAST majority of women stimulation of the G Spot will not send them into an instant screaming orgasm. Sure, some women can do it. Some women can also orgasm with stimulation of their breasts alone. Is it common? No. Are your lady parts on the fritz because you cant squirt or have a G Spot orgasm? Definitely not.

Just like the clitoris, the G spot is a button. You don't just press down on your clitoris and wait for an orgasm to happen. The same is true for your G spot. You continually stimulate it and then you orgasm. It is very unlikely that you will fly off of the bed in rapture or squirt all over the sheets. Many women may not orgasm from stimulation of the G spot or report any pleasurable sensation at all. (Guess what? You have another, more easily located button to push).

The reports of several women I know, plus my own personal observations find that a woman's G spot orgasm will vary for each women. Some of the women say that for them there is no difference in a G spot orgasm vs a clitoral orgasm. Some women say it is slightly more intense and quick than a clitoral orgasm. Others say its a softer, slower, less pronounced orgasm than a clitoral orgasm.
No instant, earth shattering orgasms were reported.

My experience is this: The G spot is a very fun button. I have several of those. When pressed separately its fun, takes me about 45 minutes to orgasm. When all are pressed sequentially its really fun and it takes me about 25 minutes to orgasm.

To sum up: If you locate and stimulate your G spot you may orgasm and you may not. The likelihood that you will have an instantaneous, intense, rapturous orgasm is pretty low.

Now that you have a realistic idea of what to expect and you are interested in trying to locate your G spot, I will explain the method I used in tomorrow's blog.

For the Love of Frida!

Today is July 6th, the day that Mexican painter Frida Kahlo was born. A feminist before her time, she inspires many women today to live fully and express themselves openly. An independent woman, Frida refused to pluck her uni brow or 'mustache'. She celebrated them, painting them into her self portraits. She was a vibrant, sexually liberated woman. Her father is quoted as telling her future husband, "She is a devil". Her works display her preoccupation with female themes and the candor with which she expressed them has made her a feminist icon in the last decades of the 20th century.

As a celebration of her life I listed my Frida: Feminist Icon Uterus Plush today.

With all of the Frida love going around I thought I would tell you a bit about her, hopefully I can do her justice.

Frida was born on July 6th, 1926. At the age of 6 she contracted polio, which left her right leg thinner than her left. She wore full, billowing Spanish skirts to hide this fact. She was working towards being a doctor. At the age of 15 she was accepted into a prestigious medical preparatory school in Mexico City. Three years later her plans changed when she was involved in a devastating bus accident.

She suffered fractures of the back, collar bone, ribs, pelvis, shoulder, and foot. An iron handrail had pierced through her abdomen and uterus. She spent over a year immobilized in bed recovering. It was during this time that Frida turned towards painting. Her mother had an easel made for her so that she would be able to create while in bed. During the span of her life Frida went through 35 operations. She lived in constant pain that would often become so intense she would be confined to the hospital for months at a time.

Drawing from her own personal experiences stemming from her numerous operations, her marriage, and miscarriages her works are characterized by stark portrayals of pain. She is quoted saying, "I never painted my dreams. I painted my own reality".
Of her 143 pieces, 55 are self portraits- most of which incorporate symbols of her physical and psychological wounds.

In 1929 Frida married artist Diego Rivera, despite her mother's disapproval. Their marriage proved to be a turbulent one. Both had fiery tempers and numerous extramarital affairs, Frida's including one of my favorite women: Joesephine Baker. Diego went a step further and had an affair with Frida's sister, Christina. This enraged Frida and the couple was divorced, but not for long. The couple remarried shortly afterword and their second marriage proved to be as turbulent as the first. They kept separate living quarters.

Before she passed Frida wrote in her journal, "I hope the exit is joyful - and I hope never to return".
Frida died on July 13th. 1954 at the age of 47. The official cause of death is cited as pulmonary embolism. No autopsy was preformed and some suspected that she died from an overdose that may or may not have been accidental. Days before her death her leg had been amputated at the knee and she was again bedridden.

About Cloth Menstrual Pads: FAQ, How To, and A Review on Betty's Site

Curious about the whole cloth menstrual pad thing?

Here are the answers to the questions I get the most often. 

Lets Talk Cloth Menstrual Pads

Pads can feel like fluffy clouds, pads can love you without leaking on you, once you've tried our pads you'll marry them and most of all, Unicorns exist.

On a more serious note... with the invent of disposable menstrual products we have come to associate menstruation with filth. It's a symbol and reminder of women's ability to create life and is absolutely NOT trash, its not dirty or filthy. By washing your menstrual pads rather than throwing them away you are not only doing something good for the environment but you are honoring yourself and your body.

*How do I use my cloth menstrual pad?
They are almost identical to using disposable pads with wings. Rather than sticking to your panties they fasten closed with a metal snap.

How often do I change my VLL cloth menstrual pad?
Gush! cloth menstrual pads are more absorbent than disposable pads, so you will be able to go longer with out having to change the pad. Average is about 1 every 4-5 hours, but that varies in your flow. Like with disposable pads you will learn while using them how often you personally need to change your pads.

How absorbent are VLL cloth menstrual pads?
Our regular flow pad consists of 2 layers of flannel, 2 of cotton terry cloth, a waterproof barrier and a stain resistant vegan fleece center. How do you like them manzanas?
The waterproof barrier lines the entire bottom layer of the pad, and to top it off terry cloth is much more absorbent than the treated cotton you find in a disposable pad.
So, what does that mean? 
Well, I have one customer that uses the maxi versions for her mother who has some problems with incontinence (which we love! Listen, when I'm old I don't want to wear a diaper- I want to wear a freaking  unicorn pad) and she swears by them. That's how absorbent they are.


What do I do with them when I need to replace them and I am not at home?
Excellent question. :)
VLL's cloth menstrual pads are designed to be able to fold and snap closed, like so:


All of the moisture is on the inside of the pad and the back of the pad- the part of the pad with the waterproof lining- is facing out, this does wonders in preventing leaks.
The easiest thing to do is fold them up and place them in a waterproof bag. Many women use zip lock bags. If you are looking for something more eco-friendly and discreet we sell leak resistant wet bags that have two separate sections: one for used pads and one for clean pads.



How do I wash my Gush! cloth menstrual pads?

Give your pad a good rinse in the sink, wring them out and repeat until the water you wring out is clear. If you have dark colored pads and see no stains your done! Just throw your pad in the wash with your other clothes.

If you see a stain and you want it gone, fill the bathroom sink or a plastic container with warm water and hydrogen peroxide. Let it sit for an hour or so. {If you have a really stubborn stain pour some fresh warm water and mix in one scoop of Oxyclean. Let it sit for an hour or so. Works every time) Then, wring out one last time and throw it in the laundry pile. That's it. Seriously, wring it out- throw it in a pile and move on with your life. 

How much money will I actually save by switching to VV cloth menstrual pads?
If you spend just $8.00 monthly on your disposable menstrual products (likely you spend more) you are spending $96.00 yearly. Every 5 years you are spending $480. 2 sets of  VLL pads will cost you $115.00, saving you $198. If you care for your pads they will last even longer than 5 years, saving you more.

How many do I need?
This really depends on your personal flow and how often you do laundry.
Our basic sets are a beautiful way to start-
Find out how often you need to change them, how often you wash them and go from there. We find that the heaviest of flow with the woman that hates laundry the most (ok, yes, Im talking about me...) only needs 5 liners and 1 maxi to go the entire week without washing clothes. We sell the main sets with 4 pads each and then if you find you need to add only 2 you can totally do that-  and in a different, fabulous pattern.
Variety really is the spice of life.

Are VLL cloth menstrual pads comfortable?
The base of the pad is made of soft vegan flannel- on both sides. And the center piece is made of this ultra soft vegan fleece that molds to your body like some kind of.. Vulva magic.

We promise you no crinkling, no bulkiness, and none of that taking a small breath before pulling out your tampon feeling.
When we say they feel like clouds, we are 100% for real.


Will my VLL menstrual pads leak?
They hold 3x more liquid than other cloth/store bought pads and they are fully lined with leak-resistant fabric. Now, just like any menstrual product if you are having a really heavy day and don't check on them or change them for hours you may end up with a leak- but with our pads you are much less likely to run into that problem.

Is there an odor problem with Gush! cloth menstrual pads?
VLL pads breath more than disposable pads- which should make them smell, right?
Actually, it helps keep your pad drier- so you will find that you don't have an odor care in the world.

How long will they last?
At the very least they will last you 3 years- if you totally don't bother to take care of them.
Depending on how well they are cared for they can last up to 7. Instructions for care are included with your order, but they are pretty much the same as you find here. So, taking good care of them really isn't hard.

Are they sanitary?
Yes. When you prick your finger it's not un-sanitary, same concept. Plus, like you panties, VLL pads are worn outside of your body, not in- tampons really just holds the menstrual blood in the vaginal canal and that can cause some problems. Not from the blood but from the tampon. Toxic shock much? And if you don't think it happens, take a look.
Menstruation is a natural, harmless substance that is in no way harmful or unsanitary.

So this all sounds too good to be true, but we can prove it. 

Use tampons? 

We promise once you try our cloth pads you will never go back. Don't believe this fairy tale? Here is a review we got on Betty Dodson's site. Yes, Betty Dodson. {Freakin love her}

So go ahead- Menstruate Fabulously!

Disney, oh the things I have learned: Part 1

I went to the Magic Kingdom for my birthday. I had not been in years and quickly came to the realization that a lot didnt register. I went back, watched some old movies and some of the new shows.
Let me share with you what I, and likely many children, have learned from Mickey:

Lets start out with a favorite:

Snow White

Snow White has very soft, feminine facial features. Her jaw line is soft, her eyebrows up high, and her nose small. She is the 'good girl' in the story.










The evil queen on the other hand has very masculine facial features. She has a defined jawline and cheekbones and her eyebrows are lower, thicker. She is obviously the 'bad girl' in the story.




What I learned: Masculine women are not as attractive as feminine women. Masculine women hate feminine women and want more than anything to be considered conventionally 'pretty', not to mention the fact that the masculine female is the evil character.

Jack Sparrow is cool, right?

Pirates are awesome, no lie. Apparently, so is the objectification of women.
Look, a wench auction! You can just buy women! And the one in red seems ok with it.
Now, dont get me wrong, I understand that historically pirates and the rape/kidnapping of women go hand in hand. But just like portraying smoking in childrens movies is a no no, in a children's theme park you might want to avoid this imagry. And yes, young children around the age of 5 do enjoy this ride. They were sitting infront of us looking adorable.

The Disney Channel rocks my socks:
In just under one hour of watching the Disney channel these are some things that zipped by me:

From the Suite Life of Zac and Cody:

Women are obsessed with precious stones – the episode begins with a character counting her stones and throwing out gold. Gold is so cheap, eww.

Women are complete idiots and they are not expected to work- “Oh no, daddy is going to fire me!” “You don’t work here…” “He’s already done it?!?” “Calm down, you never did work and you never have to work” “Yay me!”

When women have the voice of an infant they are more likable.

Hungarian women are overweight, have unibrows, manly voices, and its humorous to make fun of them.

Men are clumsy – The plumber bumps his head, wrecks the lobby, injures the butler dispenses mail throughout the lobby and the crowd there-in, the boys ruin a painting/frame, the butler knocks over a precious vase…

Men are greedy “Mom, we want you to get that bonus so that you can spend it all on us”, the Butler holds the family hostage so that he can obtain a raise

Women and gay men cook, straight men eat and judge their food : there is a kitchen scene 5 women and 1 gay male are cooking, the straight male (the chef) does nothing but go around tasting everything and informing everyone of how terrible it is

Women are jealous of one another and fight over their appearances: Two girls fight because one has taken the ‘look’ of the other, they proceed to rip hair/clothes and break heels. Because that is how all girls fight.

Asian women don’t know how to drive: A character does not know what the gear shift is, then crashes the car into the hotel lobby.

All in one episode! Amazing!

Hannah Montana

Women wear makeup in the morning and when going to bed.

Men are filthy, spit, leave their filthy underwear in every place imaginable, eat someone elses week old sandwich

Only ugly women play chess. Also, its humorous to make fun of them.

I cant watch this any more.

Even Stevens:

Intelligent, studious girls are bitches that will step on anyone to get ahead.

All in under an hour. Now that is some Disney magic. :)

Have you seen it?

There is a part of your body that changes daily. It serves as a passage way for old blood and new life. It expands, changes color and if you watch it you can tell whether or not you are ovulating, where you are in your cycle, and if you pregnant.

Have you seen it?

No?

Isnt that crazy! There is a part of your body that is completely epic and you have never seen it. I thought it was completely insane and I had to take a look.

I looked for at least an hour. I couldnt believe that the small thing I was looking at, my cervix, could do something like bring a person into this world. I started to look at her daily. Now I can tell you whether I am ovulating, about to ovulate, or when I am just a few days away from menstruation. If it ever happens I will know very quickly that I am pregnant.

Perhaps you should take a minute to look at yours.
Here is what you need:
A speculum (you can get one here: http://www.fwhc.org/sale3.htm#plainspec)
A flash light
A hand mirror
Lubricant

How to do it:

1. Put some KY jelly or water onto the bills (the rounded part ) which you will insert into your vagina) . Take a deep breath. As you exhale, let your muscles relax. To insert the speculum, hold it in one hand, handles up, bills together. Using your other hand, spread the labia and insert the bills of the speculum as you would a tampon.
   
2. When you have inserted it as far as it will comfortably go, open the bills using the mechanism on the handles that you practiced with earlier. You will feel the speculum stretch your vagina open. Lock the speculum into place. Then you can let go of it. With both your hands free, you can now hold the flashlight and mirror. Shine the beam of the flashlight into the mirror so it reflects into the vagina lighting up the internal space. Or shine the flashlight directly inside. Adjust the mirror and flashlight so you can see inside. At the back of your vagina is your cervix. It looks like a small donut with a very small opening in the center.
   
3. When you are finished, unlock and close the speculum. Then slowly and gently pull the speculum out. You may smell the speculum to become familiar with your natural smell of secretions and examine the mucus picked up on the speculum. An acidic smell is not unusual. A yeasty or fishy odor may indicate an infection.

What you see
The cervix appears as a rounded or flattened knob about the size of a quarter or half-dollar. The hole or opening in the center is called the cervical os.

If you cannot see your cervix, unlock the speculum , change the direction the bills are pointed, then reopen it. It may help to sit on a firmer surface, like the floor. If after a few tries you are unable to find your cervix, wait a few days and try again. The cervix moves somewhat during the menstrual cycle and may be easier to see in a few days.

What to look for:

Mucus: Mucus is natural. The character of the mucus changes throughout the menstrual cycle in response to hormones. It ranges from pasty-white (non-fertile) to clear and stretchy egg-white texture (fertile). The picture below is a cervix during ovulation.

Color and Texture: Cervical bluing may be the first sign that a woman is pregnant. Fifty percent of women who are pregnant will have a blue or purplish colored cervix due to an increase in blood circulation. During pregnancy, the cervix may also look puffy and softer and the os more open.

So, now you know. Go a head and take a look!

Im Giving my Period a New Identity

Not to long ago a friend of mine was over at my house and she saw my mini model sitting on my desk and a burst of "EWWW!" escaped her lips.
Clearly I missed something, so in order to clarify I asked "what?".
"It looks like she is grabbing her tummy, like she is on her period and is having cramps. That is so gross." was her reply.

I was at a complete loss for words, comprehension, anything. Apparently cramps were enough to cause my friend what was clearly immense distress.

Why would someone react like this? I couldnt stop thinking about it. I went home and while watching The Mighty Boosh a Tampax commercial came on. I started to think about tampons. You throw them in the trash, and not just any trash, a special trash. Dirty. Your menstrual cycle is very dirty.
I started to think about Midol and Yaz commercials. In both mestruation = the devil. Cramps are his unavoidable, horrible vengence. In the bible we learn that pain while giving birth and menstruation were part of a curse that was placed upon us. Everything is telling us menstruation is dirty, painful, and overall unwanted.
But is any of that true? I looked it up. I found several sources that say menstruation is a natural, harmless substance that is not at all unsanitary. I could not find a source that said it was unsanitary or unhealthy in any way.
And it is really that unwanted? Personally, I would be devisated if I could not menstruate. Its become part of my life as a woman, and I love being a woman.

I read somewhere about women who have parties for their daughter at menarche. She gets a stunning red dress, everyone eats red cake and brings her red gifts wrapped in red paper and they get down with their bad selves. I had to find pictures of this no matter how long it took, because something to rare is going to be very hard to find.
Pics from about 5 seconds into my search:
















Face painting, celebrating, pin the ovaries on the uterus and the vibrating nose. Wow, these chicks are having fun and it is all because of their periods. Periods and fun, what a crazy idea!
Well, I was not about to be left out. When my period comes I am going to celebrate her!
And I did.
I cleaned out one room, entirely. I organized, got behind all of the furtnature, bagged up things for goodwill. Thats what my uterus was doing, after all, cleaning house for a new beginning. I though I should take a hint.
I took a bubble bath and drank all of the chocolate soymilk I wanted. I made myself a favorite meal every night. I watched a scary movie cuddled up with my partner every night and every night I put on a favorite song and danced like an idiot.
This became a ritual for me. Every month I pampered, cuddled, ate some awesome food, watched some great movies, and cleaned.
I actually looked forward to my period! I loved my period! I didnt think of it as a chore or a pain, it was a new start. A reminder of my ability to do something so amazing and profound as giving birth, a declaration of my womanhood. All of the shame vanished. Why should I be sorry about something that almost every woman on the face of this panet does or has done?
Forget being sad about it, I was going to dance while drinking chocolate soy milk.
My cramps vanished.
I was on prescription painkillers before, in bed for three days with a heating pad clutching my belly.
I didnt take any painkillers, not my prescription, not midol, tylonal, not even a heating pad. All that and I was cleaning the house, dancing, and sometimes doing both at the same time.
So women, stop giving into this idea that your period is a curse. Its not. Its your body cleaning house for a new month, its a symbol of your amazing ability to create and bring life into the world. Go have a freaking party.

One more thing: Dear Tampax, Midol, Yaz, and all of you other period haters - Fuck you.
Love,
Vulva

Should we ban most marriages?

Enjoy, and California know that I stand side to side with you in this fight.
While now is a sad time we will look forward with hope, with a passion in our hearts for our fellow man.

Cunt VS Vagina

So many times when I use the C word (Cunt!) women go into a rage, understandably.
But let me explain why by looking at the origins of Cunt and Vagina:

------------------------------------({*})----------------------------------------------

ORIGINS OF THE WORD CUNT

by Gloria Bertonis, M.Ed. from the book Stone Age Divas

"Cuneiform", the most ancient form of writing, derives from "kunta" meaning "female genitalia" in Sumerian of ancient Iraq. "Kunta" is "woman" in several Near Eastern and African languages and a Mother Tongue that is being compiled by linguists today. It was also spelled "quna," which is the root of "queen." Since priestesses were known to be accountants/administrators of Temple of Inanna in Sumeria c.3100 B.C. when Cuneiform was first used, it is highly likely that cuneiform was "the sign of the kunta" who kept the books (clay tablets) for the temple economy/redistribution of wealth that evolved from communal economics of ancient mother-cultures.

So when an abuser calls a woman a "cunt" he is actually calling her a "queen who invented writing and numerals."

ORIGINS OF THE WORD VAGINA

From the Doctors at MedicineNet.com

"The word "vagina" is a Latin word meaning "a sheath or scabbard", a scabbard into which one might slide and sheath a sword. The "sword" in the case of the anatomic vagina was the penis."

------------------------------------({*})----------------------------------------------

Taking that into account I choose between a queen who invented writing and numerals and a holding place for a penis. I chose Cunt. I sing Cunt. I love Cunt.

I did Twitted

Im addicted. Lets follow eachother: http://twitter.com/VulvaLoveLovely

Lets do a product review: The Diva Cup

I recently made the switch from tampons/cloth menstrual pads to The Diva Cup coupled with cloth menstrual pads.
If you are considering The Diva Cup, let me share my experience with you.

Props:
*What Leaks? My flow is a rush, I leak onto everything after about an hour. With the Diva Cup, that worry is almost completely gone. It does leak, but hardly. I have a very lightweight cloth menstrual pad as a back up on heavy days. I can sleep through the night and wake up with clean sheets (<3).

*I find it very comfortable once its in. Some women have to cut the stem some, but I left is as is and forget completely that its there at all. (Thats saying a lot, because I am very small - 4 ft 11 in- and my Vagina is proportional).

*Saving some green! Both environmentally and fiscally. I got mine online for $17. I haven't purchased emergency tampons/pads since.

*Its so convenient! With tampons I used to have to fill my purse with them every morning. With the cup, I leave home with it in and return home with it in, no restocking (or forgetting to re-stock).

*Can I say it? I love my period! Washing your cup rather than throwing your used tampon away really changes the way you perceive menstruation. Its no longer garbage, no longer something you throw away. For me, using the Diva Cup + cloth menstrual pads is a way of honoring myself,my body, and serves as a way for me to celebrate my womanhood.

*No risk of Toxic Shock Syndrome!

*Hypoallergenic! Im allergic to latex, certain ingredients in lubricant, so and an so on (my Vagina is picky. She is a Goddess, after all). I have no problem with the silicon Diva Cup.

Fail:
*How the hell do I put this thing in? Eventually you will get the hang of it, but for your first and second cycle expect it to take a few tries.

*Menstrual blood has a very strong odor and it can be hard to get rid of. This is easily taken care of with Diva Wash. I find it works much better than soap in this particular instance.

*Suction + Horrible Cramping=Bad. When you put the Diva Cup in it seals itself in with light suction (really, its not bad at all). For me on the first day of my period Im on pain killers the pain is so bad, and on that day even dealing with the light suction can be horribly painful. That said, on regular days when I have bad cramping (not horrible) I don't really notice it.

All in all: A+. I LOVE my Diva Cup and plan to make the switch permanent.

Its Going to be Different this Time.

To all of my lovely Etsy-friends, Vulva Love Lovely is going to go under construction! With the big move for grad school hopefully coming soon its time to primp and polish my shop, so keep an eye on her. ;)
If any of you lovely people would like to look her over and send me a critique I would be so so thankful, and of course would return the favor.

http://www.vulvalovelovely.etsy.com/

Back from the Great Beyond

I have missed you so.
Where was I? Everywhere. I went to the doctor, I have a cyst in my breast because I drink too much coffee. Ive cut back on the coffee and its getting smaller, so most likely it will go away on its own.
Then I had a crazy weekend touring Florida.
My partner's cousin was married Friday, so we drove to Melbourne (1 hr). The next morning we helped my mom out at her coffee shop (hence my addiction) and then it was back to Orlando for marriage prep classes (eh..) where we stayed until 10:30 at night. That night we booked a hotel and packed for Tampa.
Why Tampa?
My partner had an interview for USF's med school! ;)
We left at 10 am Sunday morning, toured Tampa. Its really, really grungy. AKA, I hate it. We check in at 1:30, run right back out for a tailor. From there we go to a dinner with current med school students and a few other interviewees. They shared large amounts of useful information, because they are amazing. The next morning we were up at 6:30 am preparing. He was out the door by 7 am.
I got back in the bed but I couldn't sleep. He really wants to go to USF, so I really want him to get in. I lay there until 8 then go downstairs for a good workout. After leaving the hotel (it was an embassy suites, I felt very very fancy) I went to check out the campus to see if I would like going to school there for mental health counseling. Its grungy, but the trees are nice.
4 o clock I meet up with my partner whom is so tired all of the color is drained from his face. He's excited, he thinks everything went well. I knew I was going to have to make the 2 hour drive. I was horribly tired and needed a break. Tampa sucks and there is nothing to do, so we go to the movies to get some down time. Nothing good is playing, so despite our better judgement we see A Haunting in Connecticut. It was horrible. HORRIBLE.
Then I drove home while he read Wigfield to me.
It was back to both of my jobs the next day.

I need a nap.

For Shame, Shane!

L the word is reverently watched by a massive number of lesbian/bisexual/straight women across the world.
Most of them want to be Shane, which is understandable. Throw an L Word party and at least 50% of the guests will be those sought after Shane look-a-likes.
Talk about influence.
So she's pretty great, why am I ranting?

Because apparently she is magical, of another species, perhaps a Deity of some kind, and this is never dealt with in the duration of this show.
The character Shane is suspect for having had sex with over 1000 people.
20% of the population is affected with genital herpes. Therefore Shane has slept with 200 people positive for genital herpes. 18% of the population is affected with HPV, so she has slept with 180 people positive for HPV. About 1% of the population is positive for HIV, so that is about 7 people.
And yet Shane is never suspect in the show for being positive with any STD.

With so many adoring fans for not just the L Word but Shane in particular this seems just a teeny, tiny bit irresponsible. So, to the creators of L Word: shame on you.

So, how does Shane do it?
Personally I believe that she is a magical unicorn.

Boobie Update, anyone?

For those who are following the story, my lump has vanished. Its gone, completely no more. This points to a hormonal problem or a cyst. Endometriosis is a suspect. This would also account for the menstrual cramps Ive been having when not on (or anywhere near) my period. Because the lump is gone, the only way to find out what is going on would be to run various tests that would then have to be sent to a lab, therefore they would be recorded on my medical record. The tests are going to have to wait until the 1st of March when my insurance starts up.

As to why the lump vanished, here is my hypothesis: A customer and friend of mine instructed me to inform my partner that the lump was a consequence of minimal affection given to my breasts. I informed him of this and the problem was promptly addressed. Apparently, my breast just wanted some kisses.

Once I get set up for testing I will update you all.

Again, for real?

This is getting silly.

I was approved for health insurance! Score!

Except that its not effective until 3/1/09. There is a lump in my breast now, I want to have it looked at now.

I still cant bring myself to let my father in law give me a breast exam, the thought makes all of my hairs stand on end.

Ive cut out all of my caffeine (it has been replaces with horrible headaches and nausea, I think I may be slightly addicted), Im hoping that will make it magically vanish.

I believe. ;)

For real?

So, Im cleaning my house in my tank top and its hot. I wipe the sweat off of my chest and then feel this tiny pain, like a light bruise. So, I decide the best thing to do is go back to that spot and poke at it.

Its a massive lump.

There is a massive lump on my breast and I have no health insurance. So, I do the first thing that comes to mind. Call my mommy.

She proceeds to tell the entire family, then friends of the family, then just friends. Apparently once I tell her the information becomes public information.

The next day Im in tears. My great grandmother and my grandmother had breast cancer. Im only 23, this is impossible. Its probably a cyst. I take the next morning off from work so that I can spend a few hours with my partner, I need comforting. We get up, make some cinnamon rolls, its great.

Then I get an e-mail from my cousin, a text message from my mom's employee, and a call from my aunt all offering there sympathy. Did I die and just not realize it? Many of them made it a point to note hair loss. It really helped to calm me down. Do they know I havent been to the doctor yet, that no one is saying cancer?

My partner's father is an OBGYN. We called him immediately, he thinks Im too young for cancer and that its likely a cyst. Then again, breast cancer runs in my family... He offers to give me a breast exam for free while Im trying to figure out what to do as far as insurance goes.

Im touched, but I dont want to be touched. For now, Im going to pass.

My application and credit card information is with the insurance company, 7-10 days. So, no doctors appointment, no mammogram, no ultrasound for 7-10 days. No answers for 7-10 days.

Im really scared.

Freaking Awesome? I think its safe to say they are.

So who are my Lady Lovin' heros? Cat and Natalie, of course.

But why?

Because they rocked the Vag in their senior pictures.

How they got past mothers, then faculty, then yearbook editors I dont know. Natalie has her waysss :]

Want to see the pictures?
Of course you do!
Make note of the pink dangling from their necks.

;)

My Vagina is a Vagina!

Begin Rant/

I just want to clarify.
My Vagina is a Vagina.
She's not a Squishy, Coochie, Cooter, Pussy, Honey Pot, Pink, Coochie Snorcher, Vay Jay Jay, Snatch, Kitty Cat, and she's certainly not a beaver. Only on special occasion is she a Cunt.

She doesn't mind if your Vagina is a WhooWhoo, she can respect that. She will refer to your Vagina as a WhooWhoo if you like. But she, she is a Vagina.
She doesn't want to be cleaned up and made socially acceptable. She wants to smell like Vagina and look like Vagina, sometimes she wants to be wet, and in the end she never wants to be a beaver.

So, once again, my Vagina is exactly that. A Vagina.
End Rant\

Want a Free Healing Uterus Plush?

Of course you do!


Well, here is your chance. For the next month I will be running a charity drive though MyCause to raise money for a local Orlando group, Speaking Out About Rape, or SOAR.





Because of the economic crisis Soar has seen an decrease in much needed donations. This group helps women immensely, lets do our best to give thanks and return the favor! Here is the link! Once your there scroll down and click on the green "View this Charity" button, then donate!

http://www.yourcause.com/VulvaLoveLovely

SOAR provides presentations on rape awareness, educates groups who work with sexual assault victims (such as law enforcement, medical professionals, mental health workers, and advocates) on victim sensitivity and related issues, Provides financial assistance to victims when other funds are not available or don't cover a certain expense (e.g., counseling, transportation, security systems, moving expenses, daily living expenses)., works to improve the response system for victims by writing new laws, strengthening old laws, collaborating on national protocols to create a national unified response, etc., advocates for the advancement of DNA technology and the reduction of the rape-kit backlog, to help promote accuracy and success in the prosecution of rapists and so much more! Every person that donates will have their name put into a lottery. At the end of drive a winner will be selected randomly from all of the names and that supporter will win one of my Healing Uterus Plushies!

Once you donate post your name and contact email! The winner will be announced on Vday (Feb 14th).